NON-TRADITIONAL RELATIONSHIPS
Affirming therapy for relationships that do not follow a traditional script.
Ilana Grines, LMFT, provides therapy for non-traditional relationships in Los Angeles and virtually throughout California, including consensual non-monogamy, polyamory, open relationships, and partners creating agreements that reflect their actual needs and values.
YOU MAY BE HERE BECAUSE
You want support that understands the relationship you are actually building.
WHAT WE MAY WORK ON
Support for the emotional and practical realities of non-traditional relationships.
Therapy is not about pushing you toward monogamy or non-monogamy. It is about helping you make informed, consensual decisions and create relationships with greater honesty, care, and accountability.
Opening a Relationship
Explore motivations, fears, expectations, pacing, and the conversations that need to happen before changing the relationship structure.
Agreements and Boundaries
Develop agreements that are clear, realistic, revisable, and rooted in consent rather than control or avoidance.
Jealousy and Insecurity
Understand the needs, fears, comparisons, and attachment concerns beneath jealousy without treating the emotion as proof that the relationship is failing.
Uneven Readiness
Make room for differences in desire, comfort, pacing, and enthusiasm without forcing agreement or ignoring the impact on either partner.
Communication and Repair
Address ruptures, broken agreements, secrecy, resentment, emotional withdrawal, and the work required to restore trust.
Closing or Redefining
Navigate the decision to pause, close, restructure, or end a relationship with honesty and attention to everyone affected.
WHO I WORK WITH
There is no single correct way to build a meaningful relationship.
I work with individuals, couples, partners, and relationship systems navigating consensual non-monogamy, polyamory, open relationships, monogamish agreements, and other non-traditional relationship structures.
Some clients are already established in non-monogamy. Others are curious, uncertain, newly opening, or deciding whether a different structure is genuinely right for them.
AN IMPORTANT DISTINCTION
Relationship structure and LGBTQ+ identity are not the same thing.
LGBTQ+ clients may be monogamous or non-monogamous, and people in non-traditional relationships may hold any sexual orientation or gender identity. My practice is affirming across the spectrum while treating each person's identity and relationship structure with the specificity they deserve.
MY APPROACH
Curious, direct, and free from assumptions about what your relationship should become.
We will look at consent, power, attachment, communication, sexuality, boundaries, emotional safety, and practical logistics. I will not assume that monogamy is more mature, that non-monogamy is more evolved, or that one structure can solve problems that have not been addressed.
WHAT TO EXPECT
A collaborative process centered on clarity and informed choice.
Free Consultation
Begin with a complimentary 15 to 30-minute consultation to briefly discuss what is bringing you in and whether the service feels like a good fit.
Understand the System
We clarify the relationship structure, each person's needs and concerns, existing agreements, and the patterns creating distress.
Build What Fits
Together, we develop more workable communication, boundaries, agreements, repair practices, and ways of responding to difficult emotions.
COMMON QUESTIONS
What clients often want to know before starting.
Will you try to convince us to become monogamous?
No. Therapy is not organized around steering you toward one preferred relationship structure. We focus on consent, emotional safety, honesty, compatibility, and the impact of the choices being made.
Can therapy help us decide whether to open our relationship?
Yes. Therapy can help clarify motivations, fears, expectations, boundaries, and whether both partners have meaningful space to make an informed decision.
Do all partners need to attend therapy?
Not always. Therapy may involve an individual, a couple, or multiple partners depending on the concern, clinical fit, and agreed treatment structure.
Can we work on jealousy without treating it as a failure?
Yes. Jealousy can hold information about attachment, security, comparison, unmet needs, boundaries, or past experiences. The goal is to understand and respond to it rather than shame it or let it control every decision.
Do you offer virtual therapy throughout California?
Yes. Virtual therapy is available to clients located throughout California. In-person sessions are also available in Los Angeles.
How are fees determined?
Fees depend on whether therapy is structured as individual or relationship work and on the session length. We can discuss the appropriate format during the complimentary consultation.
READY TO BEGIN?
Your relationship does not need to fit a traditional model to deserve thoughtful support.
Schedule a complimentary 15 to 30-minute consultation to discuss what you are navigating and whether working together feels like the right next step.